Do you remember the airport? I stood there, losing salty tears to your cold bones, and your sleepy arms hugged me. But your honey lips didn't kiss me goodbye and your malicious blue eyes didn't watch me walk away. "Don't forget me." I whispered, "I won't." you replied. But you did. Three years, two months, twenty-two days and not a single word muttered between the 2,036 miles between us. Now you've given your heart to her and I'm sure she doesn't know my name. He doesn't know yours, he doesn't know how much I loved you and how much I bury you away. How much I can't stand thinking about your eyes. Eyes that left my lungs aching and heart flooding, kisses that knocked me to the floor, dizzy and sick, but I'd lean in for another. And I'm not asking if you love her (you do), I'm just asking if you ever think about us, and if you ever think it was worth it.
To the one that knows,
Please, please, please cut these strings. They aren't connected to my fingers, I remember you all too well anyway. They're connected to my heart, they tug and heave and yank and pull leaving more cracks and bruises than I can bear. I jerk them back, but you never, ever let go. Because you know it belongs to you, you know I'd hand it over if you asked, and I know you would mend it if you wanted to. Instead, I just remain you're "maybe" girl. Not because I'm nice or pretty or laugh at all your jokes, but because you want to give your heart to me, too. Just not yet. So I wait and I let you pull me along, because you're scared too, you're scared that if you snip me free then you'll never get me to fall for you again. But I have loved you no matter what.
And Finally,
To the wanderer,
I think you are confused. You are only a poison to me, injected into every cell and bloodstream in my body. And though you are destroying me, you are the most beautiful poison I've ever had. And sometimes I loosen all the ropes and hope the bridge will fall, but I always run across it before it does. Into your binding grip and persuasive words that drown my senses and revive my naivety. I'm fooled again, and I let your hand stay in mine again and again and again. I love you, but I can never be what you want me to be, and I can never stay content in this cage. You can't come and go as you please and expect me to remain woundless. Though I never get enough of the way you love me, so I always stay. I will always somehow be yours no matter how loud I scream for you to withdraw. I love you. I love you, forever.
